


You're A Force of Nature

by neatospiffy



Category: GOT7
Genre: Drug Use, Fanfiction, High School AU, Implied/Referenced Abuse, I’m trash, JackJin if you squint, M/M, Markbum, Recreational Drugs, Recreational Marijuana, Slight Violence, Smut, Underage Drinking, anger issues, anger management issues, angst to last a lifetime, elemental powers, freeform-supernatural, it gets kinda raunchy but in a good way???? Very vulgar language oops, it starts off raunchy too I’m so sorry, side Yugbam
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-11-07
Updated: 2016-11-07
Packaged: 2018-08-29 17:00:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 14,377
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8498044
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/neatospiffy/pseuds/neatospiffy
Summary: Mark and Jaebum can control their respective elements of fire and ice, but can they control their feelings? aka the one where I suck at summaries and Markbum is real





	1. 1.

**Author's Note:**

> this is a mess I'm sorry

Mark gritted his teeth, his blood seeming to boil as he came all over his stomach, actually able to see the heat radiating off his body in blurry waves. He quickly cleaned himself up and stood, his fiery red hair mocking him in the mirror. Why did he let Jackson talk him into dying it?  
He knew he’d present as a fire elemental, everyone in his family had been strictly married into select family lines to preserve that. He was just surprised that it was happening now, on the next-to-last day before Christmas break . He was quite possibly the last of his friends to present. Jackson and Jinyoung were Light elementals, and Yugyeom was a shadow elemental, which was super rare, especially since he presented early and was years younger than Mark, but whatever. He shrugged on a tee shirt and forced himself into pants, hating the closeness of them to his heated skin. He hurriedly put on his shoes and rushed downstairs to see his mother pottering about the kitchen preparing breakfast.  
“Good morning honey, would you like cereal or-- oh!” she gasped as she turned around and saw the heat radiating off his body.  
She smiled at him knowingly, reaching up to tuck a strand of silky black hair behind her ear. “Good thinking with the tank top,” she said, patting his shoulder. “I’m so proud of you.” Mark blushed and thanked his mother, reaching for an apple on the counter.  
“I think I’m gonna head out now,” he said, gently pulling her close for a very warm hug. She nodded and pointed to him.  
“Be safe today. Presentations aren’t always taken lightly in public,” she warned. Mark nodded to show he understood, slinging his backpack over his shoulder and heading out of the house. Once the door closed, he let out a heavy breath, setting a steady pace to school and allowing himself to get lost in his thoughts. It was beginning to cool down outside, and if Mark wasn’t an elemental, he’d be concerned for his health, wearing only a tank top.. He’d never gotten sick as a child, because fire elementals have such high temperatures naturally, but until he presented, it wasn’t definite if he was a fire elemental or a light elemental. Freak occurances happened like that, especially with how closely the two elements behaved.  
He was pulled from his thoughts for a moment by the scuff of a shoe on pavement, one that wasn’t his, and his head whipped around. A bit back, a boy around his age walked with his head down and his earbuds in, windbreaker pulled up almost to his ears. Mark didn’t recognize him, but he recognized the specialized ice-elemental jacket, designed to keep their internal body temperature down in the heat so they would maintain control over their element. The boy looked up and his gaze caught Mark’s, sharp and slanted and piercing, and Mark could feel the cold radiating off of him even from where he stood, stronger than the winter air around them.  
He turned back around, ignoring the light steps behind him. His mind began to wander again, this time focusing on the boy. Who was he? Where did he come from? Mark could still feel the cold waves coming off of him, and they washed over his heated skin deliciously, soothing the heated burn and bringing with each pulsing wave a scent, the boy’s scent, and Mark decided that it was soothing too.  
The boy smelled fresh and clean, crisp and undeniably cold, like something spicy but sweet, and Mark considered this as he walked onto the campus.  
He saw Youngjae first, sitting in the grass with his hands lying gently to either side, fingers pushed deep into the soil. Mark smiled at his friend, sitting on the bench not too far from him so as not to harm the grass with his heat. Youngjae was a nature elemental, and could connect with plants and animals of every kind, including people, with his elementally-gifted abilities, but he much preferred using music to connect to people, Mark learned.  
He was a gentle boy, soft in every aspect and precious beyond belief. Plants and people alike blossomed under his gentle touch and loving attitude, and he was well-liked around campus. He had many suitors, practically everyone who talked to him, with the exception of Mark, which was why he liked Mark’s company more than theirs. Mark was quiet, and he supposed that Youngjae appreciated the break from requests of “can you fix my plant?” to “Are you free tomorrow night?” and Mark was more than happy to be a calming presence.  
He waited for Youngjae to say something first, letting him finish meditating lest he be playfully smacked and chided for interrupting his connection.  
After a few moments his friend looked up, brown doe eyes lifting as he smiled at Mark. “Hey, Mark-hyung. You finally presented!” Mark smiled back, nodding.  
“It was really unexpected.” Youngjae nodded, brushing the dirt from his fingers and folding them in his lap as he listened.  
“I bet. I presented last year on the reservation field trip, do you remember that?” Mark did. Youngjae had felt faint and nauseous all day until he sat on the ground, and the plants listed towards him like he was the sunlight they needed to survive. He’d thrown up soft leaves and flower petals, and that was that. Mark inhaled his friend’s calming, earthy scent before replying.  
“I was scared for you,” he admitted, not for the first time.  
“I know.”  
The bell rang then, ending their conversation, and Mark belatedly realized that at some point, the ice elemental had walked past and left, taking his cooling presence with him, whilst Mark chatted with Youngjae.

 

Mark looked up from his notes (which were more doodles than anything,) when the teacher cleared his throat for an announcement.  
“Class, we have a new transfer student,” he said, gesturing for someone behind the door to enter. Mark decided to ignore it, since it didn’t pertain to him. He was too shy to look anyway. “His name is Jaebum and I expect you all to treat him respectfully, show him around and help him with the class.” There was a hum of unwilling agreement as the class regarded the new student, and a few gasps from the girls behind him caused Mark to look up again.  
Standing there was the ice elemental, Jaebum, and a shiver ran down Mark’s spine when he realized that Jaebum’s gaze was, and had been, fixed pointedly on him. Mark felt a different heat rush to his cheeks and glanced away.  
“Jaebum, there’s an empty seat next to Mark, right there in the corner,” the teacher said, and Mark cursed mentally. He watched through his eyelashes as Jaebum’s lips formed around Mark’s name silently, as if tasting it for a moment before he nodded and proceeded to the desk next to his. The boy’s walk was easy, and his ears glittered with piercings. Again, his scent washed over Mark, stronger this time as he sat down and took out a sketchbook. As he flicked through the pages, Mark saw beautifully drawn portraits, watercolor pieces, and an in-depth study of the structure of plants. It was all in Mandarin, and it took a moment for Mark’s brain to switch language before he recognized the characters.  
The boy glanced up at him and Mark blushed at being caught staring. He instead chose to focus on his own doodles, mind seemingly magnetized to the boy next to him. Waves of cold washed over him and soothed his burning skin, and Mark knew his warmth was probably suffocating to the boy. He decidedly ripped a piece of paper out of his spiral-bound notebook, scrawling in sloppy characters across the top few lines.  
_Sorry, I’m probably way too warm right now. Presented today._ Almost as an afterthought, in Mandarin, he wrote, _I like your sketchbook, I wish I could draw._ He added a sad face, enveloping it in a circle to make it a head, and drew little cartoon flames coming off of it before meticulously and precisely folding it up into a crisp paper airplane before realizing that it was ridiculous to fold it like that because he was right there.  
But it was already folded. Mark used his palm to toss it up onto Jaebum’s desk as soon as the teacher’s back was turned, hurriedly burying himself in his work when he looked up. He missed the confused smile that crinkled Jaebum’s eyes into little crescents as he looked over the paper. Jaebum wrote a response before folding it again, and Mark’s eyes latched onto the veins curving over the back of his hands. The paper airplane landed suddenly in front of his nose, and Mark glanced at the boy, who was avidly paying attention to the lesson being scrawled on the dry-erase board. He unfolded it as quietly as he could.  
_It’s not_ _too warm at all,_ it said. _It’s a welcome change, actually._ _And thank you, but my drawings are nothing special. You presented today?_  
Mark wrinkled his nose and scrawled a reply.  
_Shush, your drawings are amazing. And yeah, I know, late bloomer and all, but I don’t mind._  
He tossed it onto Jaebum’s desk. A few moments later, it landed on his again.  
_Do you like rap or hip hop? Or even just dance?_  
Mark’s brow furrowed as he responded.  
_I love all three, why?_  
This time he saw the smile that threatened to break Jaebum’s face, and wondered why his reply could elicit such a beautiful grin. Jaebum wrote quickly, pausing for a moment as the bell rang. He hurriedly wrote and didn’t bother folding it up again, instead placing it on Mark’s desk as he slung his backpack over one shoulder and smirked at him before walking out of the room.  
There was an address, one that he knew to be a few streets away from the school. Beneath that, in Jaebum’s messy blue pen, was this:  
_I’d like to take you here sometime. I think you’d like it. I b-boy sometimes._  
I know this is sudden, and weird if you really think about it, but you’re cute. I hope this doesn’t make things weird in the future. It’s up to you if you’d want to go.  
Mark’s cheeks flamed as he saw the phone number beneath this. The entire walk to his next class was spent grinning like an idiot.

 

At lunch, Jackson noticed his expression, and immediately began bombarding him with questions.  
“Why are you so happy? You sat down with that tray like it was the best food in the world.” He plastered himself against Mark’s side, unaffected by the heat, since he was such a close element to Mark. Jackson’s hands came up to Mark’s arm and he shook him back and forth.  
“Is it someone? Are you dating? Did you find money? What happened? Who pulled a rainbow out of your ass this morning?” Jackson pestered. Mark hummed noncommittally.  
“Maaaaaaaark, tell meeeee,” he whined. Mark patted him on the head and put a fry into his own mouth.  
“I’m just happy, Jacks,” he said. Jackson huffed.  
“Tell him what?” Said a voice behind them, and Mark looked over his shoulder to see Bambam and Yugyeom standing behind them, trays in hand. Bambam was Yugyeom’s boyfriend, a slim Thai boy with a shock of pink in his dark bangs and carefree tanned skin. Yugyeom’s own blond hair hung in his eyes as he sat.  
“Mark’s seeing someone, or something,” Jackson said. “He’s insanely happy. He’s actually smiling while eating school food.” By the end of this statement, Jackson’s voice lowered conspiratorially into a whisper. Bambam gasped, leaning in like it was a secret being shared over soggy fries. Yugyeom just watched calmly, one arm around his boyfriend’s shoulders. It was an awkward pose, because his boyfriend leaned in to whisper with Jackson in mock whispers, loud enough to be heard by anyone who cared to listen, but Yugyeom looked content to be there.  
The bench next to Mark creaked as Youngjae sat next to him, tupperware full of salad placed in front of him. To Jackson’s side, Jinyoung sat down, and Jackson simpered and complained to him about Mark’s sudden mood change.  
“Someone’s glowing,” Youngjae murmured to Mark. Mark allowed himself to smile.  
“It’s nothing,” He said.  
Youngjae smiled too.  
“Okay. But, if it was something, I’d want to know.” Mark’s smile widened.  
“Maybe.”

  
{three weeks later.}

Mark walked home with his earbuds stuffed into his ears and his music blasting. As Mark scuffed his feet on the asphalt, he pondered his day. He’d caught fleeting glances of Jaebum in the hallways all week, and every time, he looked up to find the other boy’s eyes trained on him, though he only talked to Mark respectfully and occasionally in class. It was unnerving.  
(read: It made him blush every time.)  
He didn’t see Jaebum at all on his walk home, didn’t feel the waves of cold air that flowed off of him. Mark himself had stayed behind to attend a math tutoring class, so he wasn’t surprised. If anything, he was slightly disappointed to not see the mysterious boy. But he pushed those thoughts aside. He focused on getting home without being hit by a car, listening to his music on shuffle, and hoping that a breeze would come through and cool his skin. He was always warmer, now that he’d presented. He’d also bleached his hair to a platinum white in an effort to get Jaebum to talk to him again, but the boy barely took notice. (Not that Mark would admit his reasons for dying it, if he had been asked.)  
As Mark reached his porch and stepped inside, he pulled his earbuds out, ears ringing, and greeted his mother. There was no reply, and he’d been too distracted to see if her car was in the driveway while walking, suggesting that she was working late again.  
Ruffling through his backpack, he pulled out a very crumpled piece of paper with graphite rubbed into the folded crease and writing on it. As he opened it up and carefully straightened it out, his stomach sank.  
Jaebum’s phone number and the address he’d written glared up at him in the same blue ink, stark against the paper.  
Mark hurriedly took out his phone and put the number into his contact list, saving it as Jaebummie, since the boy was probably younger than him. He sent out a hurried message and sunk down to sit against the wall, heart pounding. He might have messed up what could have been a great friendship with his carelessness, and he jumped as his phone vibrated almost instantly.  
_It’s okay,_ the message read, _but I was scared you were ignoring me._ Mark swallowed heavily.  
_I couldn’t find our note paper._  
It’s all good :)  
Mark found himself smiling at the emoji.  
The rest of his afternoon was spent sitting in the same spot on the floor, texting back and forth with Jaebum like gunfire. They clicked, and they had a lot of the same interests, comparing music libraries and favorite authors like they were together in person.  
In person.  
Mark ignored the sudden twist of his stomach as his thumb hovered over the send button, eyeing the question with wariness.  
_When can I see this b-boying of yours_?  
He closed his eyes and hit send. A small typing bubble popped up.  
_I’m actually scheduled for tonight if you’re free?_  
Mark caught his lip between his teeth in a smile.  
_When?_  
_8:00_ , Jaebum replied. _Dress casually but don’t look homeless, lol, I have a reputation to uphold at this place._  
Mark snorted.  
_Damn, there go my plans to show up in a garbage bag_.  
Jaebum sent a laughing emoji and Mark smiled as he stood up and stretched his sore muscles, cracking his joints and loosening up after sitting for so long.

 

Mark glanced at himself in the mirror for a moment. Jaebum had said casual, but Mark wasn’t sure about his outfit. He wore tight leather pants with a chain dangling over his right hip, a black turtleneck sweater to keep his heat close to him, and god, was it tight. It showed the slender taper of his hips, the slight definition to his arms. He knew that there’d be at least a few pairs of eyes on him, but all he cared about was whether or not Jaebum’s were one of them.  
With a quick decision, he smoked some eyeliner across the outer corner of his upper lids, accentuating the sleek shape, and looked at himself again. Definitely better.  
His phone buzzed in his pocket.  
_I’m outside. Hope you’re ready for aux cord duty, cause you’re riding shotgun_. Mark flushed with excitement and left a note for his mother on the table, explaining that he’d gone out with a friend.  
He stepped out of the front door and saw Jaebum parked in a sleek car, solid black like Mark’s outfit, and Mark swallowed nervously, thankful for the darkness of early nightfall covering his blush. He waved lightly as he walked around to the passenger door, sliding inside.  
Jaebum’s car smelled like weed and strawberry air fresheners, and Mark’s mouth watered as he regarded Jaebum. He wasn’t dressed any particular way, definitely not more than casually, but his legs were framed nicely in distressed jeans, and the slight muscle of his chest was accentuated by the white tee he wore, leather jacket holding his elemental cold close to his skin. His mind blanked as he saw the backwards hat, exposing Jaebum’s forehead and drawing attention to his strong eyebrows and feline eyes.  
Jaebum smiled nervously at him.  
“You look nice,” he said. Mark was pretty sure he imagined the hoarseness in his voice and smiled back.  
“Thanks, you do too.”  
“You ready?” Mark nodded, buckling up and plugging the aux into his phone and pulling up his music library.  
“What’re you in the mood for?”  
“You said you have Frank Ocean, right?”  
“Yeah, dude, of course.”  
He started playing an older album and Jaebum grinned, pulling away from the house. Jaebum fiddled with the steering wheel, tapping his fingers and scratching at the leather’s seams, and Mark figured he was nervous about performing in front of him.  
“Do you mind if I smoke?” Jaebum blurted.  
“Go ahead, man, but you’d better share.”  
Jaebum laughed breathily and gestured to the glove box. “I already rolled, they’re in there.” Mark grinned easily and pulled it open, seeing three large spiffs and a tie-dye print lighter lying amongst the paper napkins and coupons. He plucked out the largest one and held it out. Jaebum shook his head.  
“You can have the first pull.”  
Mark’s grin widened as he placed it between his own lips, lighting it and letting his eyes drift shut as he inhaled the smoke. It’d been so long, too long, and the heady scent of weed mixed with the crisp scent of Jaebum that was drifting over, and Mark felt his nerves begin to melt away.  
He passed the blunt to Jaebum, who took a deep pull before letting the smoke flow out of his mouth, arcing up shortly into his nose in a reverse waterfall. He smiled at Mark as he blew the smoke out of his nostrils like a dragon before passing it back.  
Mark giggled boyishly, and soon their entire ride was spent laughing without a care and passing the blunt back and forth. The smoke accumulated in the car, mixing with the cold pulsing off of Jabum and the warmth off of Mark. They laughed at each other singing along goofily to the choruses of songs, they laughed at a broken streetlight, once, and Mark was glad that the tension between them had dissipated like the smoke they exhaled.  
Jaebum parked the car and snorted back his laughter, leaving both windows cracked open a bit to air out the car before turning it off. Mark blinked and he was gone, opening Mark’s door from the outside, and Mark flushed easily, floating too freely to care. He took in their surroundings, seeing the flickering neon lights a few stories up and the crumbling brick facade they were attached to. Mark let Jaebum grip softly onto his elbow as he walked them up to the door and knocked, the tinkling of Mark’s chain mingling with their echoing footsteps.  
The door cracked open and a breathy laugh was heard before it opened and Mark’s mouth fell open to see Yugyeom standing behind it, dressed totally different than he usually did. He had on eyeliner and a snapback, clad in all black, and he looked dangerous.  
Until he laughed.  
Mark laughed too, frowning slightly at the situation but happy to see his friend nevertheless.  
“I didn’t know you were bringing someone along tonight, man,” Yugyeom said, giving Jaebum a familiar bro handshake.  
“I think you already know each other,” Jaebum grinned, “Just make sure he doesn’t get too wasted.” Yugyeom’s grin darkened and he looked more than mischievous as he nodded, stepping aside to let them in.  
It was crowded inside, with strobe lights flashing from one corner and the thick musk of weed and alcohol mingling with the scents of the elements.  
“Whoa,” Mark breathed. Yugyeom made a noise of agreement, gesturing towards an empty chair by the wall.  
“It’ll be a few before he comes out, and I’d advise sitting down until then so you don’t get caught up in the grind chain. Unless you want that.” Mark shook his head, considering the floor of sweaty bodies. His brain helpfully supplied an image of he and Jaebum in said grind chain, and he blushed uncontrollably before sitting down in the provided chair.  
“See Wonpil at the bar if you want a drink,” Yugyeom muttered, eyeing the door. Mark figured that they didn’t card, since it was an exclusive hideout and there was a door monitor, and he nodded. Yugyeom nodded back and went to stand by the door again.  
Mark let his mind drift, pleasantly hazy with the cloud of smoke above them and the thumping of the bass shaking his bones. The music stopped and there was a collective buzz about the crowd as they murmured, and the lights went out all at once. There were a few excited screams, more excited murmurs. There was a slight pause in the crowd and the entire building lapsed into eager silence. A spotlight lit up the small stage Mark had failed to notice. Out from the darkness stepped Jaebum, looking impossibly imposing and dangerous.  
The crowd erupted into screams and cheers, a few muffled yells of “Defsoul” or something of the like ringing out.  
The music started, a beat that Mark recognized but couldn’t place, and Jaebum started moving.  
His feet were a blur as he danced, and Mark was impressed. Jaebum turned and dropped, landing on his palms and beginning to breakdance, and Mark was beyond impressed.  
He watched with open curiosity and admiration as Jaebum twisted and spun, shirt riding down and exposing a wonderfully toned stomach. His skin began to glow with a sheen of what looked like sweat, and Mark briefly wondered if it was possible for ice elementals to heat up enough to sweat before Jaebum backflipped up to a standing position, resuming dancing.  
The tempo slowed and he locked eyes with Mark as he began a sexier, slower dance with _so many body rolls._ At one part he grabbed his crotch, lip trapped tight between his teeth, and Mark felt something pulsing in his stomach begin to travel south.  
_Notnownotnownotnow_ , he hissed at himself. Jaebum seemed to sense this and smirked, lip still trapped between perfect teeth, and if Mark wasn’t sitting, his knees would have felt weak.  
Jaebum’s entire act was incredibly sexy, so incredibly different from the boy Mark had known in the car, over text. Jaebum’s hooded eyes glanced around the crowd as he performed, lids hanging lower than usual and darkened with shadow. He looked wanton, dangerous, thrillingly and effortlessly hot. Mark’s eyes followed a drip of sweat as it ran down his glistening neck, pausing at the exposed collar bone before hitting the shirt. He swallowed heavily.  
The crowd’s chants began to pick up volume, the echoing cries of “Defsoul!” turning to background noise as Mark watched Jaebum’s body seem to unfurl and twist in ways that shouldn’t have been possible, or legal at the very least.  
The music stopped with one last striking chord that held its own for a long moment, and Jaebum held a pose for the same duration. His left arm was up, hand angled like he was about to snap his fingers, his other hand gripped tightly onto the front of his pants. His head was almost completely lowered, dripping beads of sweat that formed little ice crystals as they fell. His eyes were barely visible, but they were locked on Mark with an unreadable expression, and Mark felt as though he’d completely sobered up. As Jaebum exited the stage with a bow, Mark shakily stood up and wobbled over to the bar.  
A handsome young man stood cleaning a glass, an incredibly cliche bar visual.  
“Um, hi,” Mark said. “Yugyeom told me to talk to someone named Wonpil?”  
The man smiled easily.  
“That’s me. Thirsty?”  
Mark nodded. “Jagerbomb, please.” The man’s eyes narrowed in a wider smile as he began to prepare it, and Mark downed it almost as soon as he placed it on the counter. The glass felt cool against his skin and he gripped onto it, turning not-so-subtly to scan the crowd for Jaebum.  
He spotted him with his hands on the hips of a girl, one he’d seen at school. Dana? Dara? Something like that. She arched her back and swayed her hips rhythmically, her water element giving her the fluidity and flexibility to work well with Jaebum’s ice.  
Mark felt a burning start in his chest, working its way down through his veins.  
He’d never been properly jealous, and he didn’t know why he was jealous, but it turned to lava in his veins. Well, literally. He looked down to see his skin glowing a muted orange, more prominent where his veins were. It was unreal. The glass his drink had been in was melting, an angry red glow forming around the hand shape pressed into the melted glass. He glanced at Wonpil, slightly terrified, and Wonpil looked the same.  
“Hey, uh, maybe you should go to the bathroom, or something, alright? Cool down?” Mark nodded numbly, passing by Jaebum and his pretty companion and almost shoving Yugyeom out of the way, stepping out into the cool outside air. His skin was still alight with burning veins, and anger simmered deep within his chest. He didn’t care that Jaebum had driven him here, he wanted to go home, and he wanted to go _now_.  
He took a steadying breath, however, and willed the burn in him to lessen. Regardless of what he wanted, everyone expected him to remain, and so, with the veins in his skin a little less bright than before, he stepped back inside, past a startled Yugyeom, to his seat at the bar.

 

After his second Jagerbomb and a few shots of something that felt warm but incredibly sour as he took them down, Mark’s anger was gone, replaced by a (more than) tipsy excitement. He’d come up with an incredibly bad plan, and as he sipped at the water he was supposed to be drinking more of, he decided to set it into action.  
His first step was to find Jaebum. He was so pretty, no. He’s still kinda mad at him. He spotted him talking to the girl from earlier and another one, this one with long blonde hair and heavy false lashes. Helpfully, his brain supplied “chongin” (even though her name was Chaelin.)  
Step two was to pull Jaebum onto the dance floor under the guise of a dance. Then he’d wink at the DJ, who would play a song similar to the one Jaebum danced to, and it would be Mark’s turn. He’d do the same thing to Jaebum that Jaebum had done to him, and then they’d be friends again, and they’d be even.  
Step three was optional, but Mark kind of hoped it’d happen anyway. Step three consisted of kissing Jaebum and making out in his car, maybe going further, whatever.  
With a hazy plan in mind, Mark shakily stood up, teetering dangerously for a moment before finding his balance. He took one step, two steps, and then he was tipping backwards. He fell right into a strong chest, and well-muscled arms grabbed him around the middle and hoisted him up. He looked up and saw that he’d bumped into Jaebum, who had gotten up whilst Mark was planning and was about to check on him.  
So, step one was essentially done, and this counted as part of step two, right?  
Mark stood, with Jaebum’s help, and looked over his shoulder to where the DJ would be. He winked exaggeratedly and gave a thumbs up, much to Jaebum’s confusion.  
And nothing happened.  
Apparently, if you make a plan involving other people, you have to get them in on it first.  
“Who are you winking at?” Jaebum asked.  
Mark looked back at him and shushed him, giggling drunkenly as he winked again, this time looking more at the wall than anyone.  
Jaebum held back a snicker.  
“Come on, you’re drunk. Let’s get you home.”  
“No,” Mark whined. “Gotta.. Step two! Yeah, we gotta do step two,” he babbled, grabbing Jaebum’s wrist and pulling him unsteadily into the crowd of dancing people.  
“Step.. two?” Jaebum murmured, the question in his tone escaping Mark’s fuzzy mind. Mark grabbed one of Jaebum’s hands in each of his own, placing them on his hips and wrapping his own arms around his neck. Mark swayed a bit too dramatically to the music, slow dancing even though it was an energetic dance beat. Jaebum bit back a smile and let him drag him from side to side.  
Mark looked up at him with unfocused eyes.  
“Um, step two is done now I guess. Can we do three?”  
“Huh?” Jaebum frowned.  
“Um, well, uh, step three.” he pressed a quick kiss to Jaebum’s lips. “Like that, see? Except more tongue and open mouthing and stuff, and like, our hands would do like this.” He gently took Jaebum’s wrists in his hands and wiggled them up and down on his own back.  
Jaebum looked frozen, a pink blush spreading across his high cheekbones, and Mark pondered this for a moment before deciding he wasn’t mad at him anymore, couldn’t be mad at someone so beautiful.  
He pouted. “Fuck, we can’t do it now.” Jaebum snapped out of his daze.  
“What?”  
Mark huffed. “I said, we can’t do step three now. I’m not mad anymore, ‘cause you’re so pretty. Did you know that? You’re, like, handsome, really handsome, but you’re just kinda, I dunno, pretty. It’s distracting.” Mark poked Jaebum’s side just under his ribs. “You’re distracting.”  
Jaebum frowned slightly. “Mad?”  
Mark huffed again, rolling his eyes and leaning into Jaebum’s shoulder dazedly.  
“Yeah, I was mad ‘cause you had these girls on you, you know,” he lowered his voice conspiratorially, “grinding and stuff, and I got kinda jealous but kinda not jealous but mostly jealous and a little angry and so I started ordering drinks,” he slurred. “Have you ever had a Jagerbomb? They’re great, really, you should try one.”  
Jaebum seemed to be processing and so Mark dragged him over to the now vacant couch and pushed him down onto it, giggling maniacally as he bounced, and maybe they could do step three after all?  
Jaebum looked up at him with wide eyes and Mark grinned, feeling the alcohol in his veins slow his movements, but confident in them nevertheless. He placed his hands on Jaebum’s shoulders and placed a knee on either side of his hips, straddling him and pinning him to the couch. His skin was cold as it always was, and Mark’s was warm but not hot, dampened by the proximity and the alcohol. He pressed his lips to Jaebum’s and licked at the seam fervently, and as soon as the younger opened his mouth, Mark was kissing him, and he was hesitantly kissing back, and Mark felt arousal pump in his veins and head south.  
He began to rock his hips against Jaebum’s, and he felt his hands come up to his waist, and _holyshitwasthisactuallyhappening_ , but then Jaebum used those hands to stop him, hold him in place over his thighs. He pulled away and looked at Mark with lips shiny with spit.  
“We can’t do this,” Jaebum said.  
“Why?”  
“You’re drunk. I’m not going to take advantage of you like that.”  
Mark pouted and leaned down again to mouth at his neck, trying to taste the sweat from earlier. Jaebum’s breath hitched as he darted his tongue out and licked a small section, nibbling on it soon after.  
“Mark,” He rasped. Mark grinned against his skin, letting the pounding bass of the music set the pace as he sucked bruises into the skin where Jaebum’s neck and shoulder met.  
“What if,” Mark murmured next to his ear, “I _want_ you to take advantage of me?”  
Jaebum swallowed heavily, exhaling harshly as Mark nibbled up to his ear and gave it a quick nip.  
He seemed to tense beneath him, and Mark took a moment to feel Jaebum’s cool skin against his cheek.  
“What if,” he repeated, licking a sinful stripe up Jaebum’s neck, “I like being taken advantage of? If I want you to use me for your own pleasure?” Jaebum groaned again and his fingertips pressed harshly into Mark’s hips.  
“Don’t do this,” Jaebum rasped.  
“Do what?”  
“Make me want you like this,” he whispered.  
Mark knew he couldn’t see his grin.  
“I _want_ you to want it,” Mark murmured, (slurred), letting one hand tease the hem of Jaebum’s shirt up, the other placed on his opposite shoulder. He mouthed and nipped at his skin, humming against him as his hands tightened on his hips again.  
He rolled his hips once more, this time meeting no resistance from Jaebum. In fact, the younger used his hands to pull Mark down harder, and _oh_ , Mark felt exactly how hard he was, pressing next to how hard Jaebum was, and he didn’t even know ice elementals could get so _warm_. The boy’s crotch was absolutely burning, and the rest of his skin was beginning to feel cooler than before.  
Jaebum rutted up against him, and Mark switched sides on his neck, sucking mottled bruises into the beautifully tanned skin, nipping and licking and sucking like he was a delicious snack, and he’d be damned if he wasn’t. He pulled back to admire his work in the flashing lights, loving how absolutely wrecked Jaebum looked. He crashed their lips together once more and kissed him desperately, hips moving faster. Jaebum moaned against his mouth, and Mark thought it was the best thing he’d ever heard.  
“We can’t do this here,” Jaebum said between kisses.  
“Let’s leave then.”  
Jaebum agreed by gripping Mark’s belt loops and picking him up with ease, standing up and grabbing his hand, and Mark did his best to ignore how perfectly their hands fit together. At the door, Yugyeom caught his eye, winking like he wasn’t a sophomore in high school, no doubt already knowing why Mark and Jaebum were leaving. Mark blushed and smiled dumbly at him. He was starting to feel less unstable on his feet, and the excitement of what they were leaving to do made his stomach tingle with butterflies.  
Once they were outside, Jaebum pushed him up against the brick wall, kissing him fervently. One of his knees slid between Mark’s thighs, putting delicious pressure on his crotch, and eliciting a moan. Mark didn’t even care that the wall he was against was probably disgusting, or that they were in full view of any possible pedestrians, he simply let his head fall back and lost himself in Jaebum’s mouth on his neck and the friction on his erection. Jaebum nibbled at the skin just behind his ear, and Mark gasped, because he didn’t even know that the skin there was that sensitive. Every puff of breath turned into an icy cloud in the cold air, and it felt surreal.  
“Let’s-- mmf,-- let’s get to the car,” Mark panted, and Jaebum hummed against him. One of his hands gripped Mark’s, pulling him to the car.  
It still smelled like weed inside, but Mark couldn’t care less as Jaebum sat in the passenger seat and pulled Mark into his lap, reclining the seat as far back as it could go and closing the door before locking it. He grinned up at Mark wickedly.  
At this angle, Mark’s weight pushed his crotch down against Jaebum’s where he straddled him, and he leaned forward to kiss him again.  
Jaebum’s hands slipped under his shirt, and Jaebum’s thumbs worked slow, warm circles into the skin of his hips, and Mark felt the last of his drunkenness step aside in favor of tingling from head to toe.  
Mark tugged at Jaebum’s clothes, whining quietly.  
“Off,” he insisted. Jaebum complied and Mark leaned back to let him peel off his jacket and shirt, letting him take off Mark’s as well. Their lips met again, cool skin meeting unusually warm skin, and Mark’s eyes nearly rolled back in his head at the contrasting temperatures of their chests as they pressed together.  
“So pretty,” Jaebum murmured, pulling away to look at Mark’s torso illuminated by the moonlight through the car windows and the neon lights. Mark let out a shaky breath as Jaebum sucked bruises into his shoulders and across his collar bones. Their crotches moved slowly back and forth across each other, and Mark let out an embarrassing whimper. Jaebum liked it, judging by the way his eyes darkened with arousal.  
“Do you want,” Jaebum began. Mark cut him off with a kiss.  
“I want to.”  
Jaebum looked at him with stars in his eyes, swallowing heavily. His hair was starting to stick to his forehead with the thin sheen of sweat that dusted his skin, and he gestured to the center console.  
“I have lube and condoms.”  
Mark blushed and opened it, Jaebum helping him to slide his pants and boxers off.  
“Have you ever done this before?” Jaebum asked softly. Mark shook his head.  
Jaebum nodded and slicked up his fingers, tracing Mark’s hole with the tip of his finger before pressing in experimentally. Mark’s face distorted in discomfort, and Jaebum distracted him by kissing him deeply and stroking his now freed erection. His finger slid in up to the second knuckle, and he stilled for a moment, allowing Mark to adjust to the sudden intrusion. Jaebum moved it slowly in and out, and, okay, it felt nice and all, but Mark didn’t see what all the hype was about.  
Jaebum added a second finger, continuing to pump his other hand around Mark’s straining cock and kissing him just as passionately, and Mark whimpered against the burn. But as Jaebum moved his fingers slowly in and out again, he crooked them a certain way and Mark’s back arched, a helpless squeak escaping his lips as galaxies flashed behind his eyes.  
“Holy _fuck_ ,” he panted, pressing back onto Jaebum’s fingers desperately. They brushed the spot again and Mark keened, barely noticing the third finger Jaebum added.  
He scissored Mark open slowly, brushing against his prostate as often as possible, and Mark was light years away. His head swam and all he could feel was Jaebum, Jaebum’s chest under his fingertips, Jaebum’s fingers inside him, Jaebum’s cool skin, Jaebum, Jaebum, everything _Jaebum_. Jaebum’s fingers left and he whined for a moment, too out of it to notice that he was rolling on a condom and spreading lube over his length. The tip pressed against his entrance, and even though Jaebum had stretched him, it fucking _hurt_. He clenched his teeth and let his forehead rest on Jaebum’s, letting him bottom out.  
“I know it hurts, lovely boy, just tell me when it’s okay to move.” Mark whimpered and adjusted his hips slightly, getting used to the feeling of being so full, waiting for the burn to recede.  
Once it did, he nodded at Jaebum, who moved his hips experimentally slow. Mark could feel the drag of his cock along his insides, could feel the pressure against his prostate, could feel Jaebum’s hand begin stroking him again in time with his thrusts.  
Mark’s head swam, the pain gone.  
“Faster, fuck, _please_ , please go faster,” he babbled. Jaebum placed both hands on his hips, steadying him as he pounded into him. The sound of skin slapping against skin was so lewd, so loud in the small space. He hit Mark’s prostate every few thrusts and Mark cried out, taking his own cock in hand and using his thumb to spread the beads of precome around the head, stroking himself to Jaebum’s pace.  
Jaebum watched him with celestial eyes, like Mark was the entirety of the galaxy and he was just now seeing it, like Mark was made of diamonds and he was a poor man. His eyes were blown wide with pleasure and something else as he watched Mark, and Mark choked out Jaebum’s name as he came, spilling onto Jaebum’s chest with a broken sob of pleasure.  
Jaebum’s hips stuttered and then he came, too, holding Mark’s hips down hard as he filled the condom. He gently lifted Mark off of him and tied the condom off, tossing it out the door.  
Mark blinked sleepily at him as Jaebum as he wiped the cum from his chest and put his shirt back on, pulling up his jeans. He helped Mark back into his shirt and brushed the sweaty bangs from his forehead gently, his expression hard to read. He started up the car and the air conditioning felt great on his overheated skin, and as he wiggled back into his underwear and curled into the seat, Jaebum put on a song that they’d both agreed was their favorite earlier in the day. Mark’s senses lasered in not on the song, not on the movements of the car as they began driving, but on Jaebum. His skin was beginning to emanate the same coldness as it did before, and something about it was comforting, in an odd way. It balanced out the heat radiating from Mark’s own skin. The song was quiet, and Jaebum was there, and Mark fell asleep, for the first time in a long time, unburdened by loneliness.

 

He woke up in a bed that wasn’t his. His head pounded and he couldn’t remember much more than Jaebum’s dance and then them, in the car, and oh. _Oh_. The scent of Jaebum hit him, mixed with warm sheets and incense, and he knew that this was Jaebum’s room.  
Mark rubbed at his eyes and sat up slowly, taking in the room. The walls were a medium blue and covered in posters, with a few guitars hanging opposite the bed and a multitude of dream catchers hanging from the ceiling above him. He slid to the edge of the bed, glancing around more as he did. The floor was a bit messy, but it was mostly clothes and the occasional guitar pick. He almost shrieked as something cold and wet bumped against his ankle, and he looked down warily to see a cat.  
Jaebum. Cool, effortlessly amazing Jaebum, had a cat. Mark was beginning to think he was actually a softie.  
She was cute, with a dark gray nose and ears, the same gray tinting her feet and tail. Wide blue eyes peered up at him innocently from within white fur and he picked her up, stroking the soft fur of her ears as he pondered what he should do. She didn’t seem to mind his dilemma, instead choosing to settle herself in his arms, purring. He barely registered the noise.  
A loud clank outside the door made him wince, and before he could attempt to lay back down and pretend to be asleep, the cat jumped off of him and onto the floor, meowing up at the door loudly. Mark held his head in his hands as the door opened, and guessing from the immediate influx of cold, it was Jaebum.  
“I brought you some painkillers,” He said quietly. Mark appreciated the quiet tone of his voice.  
“Thanks,” he rasped.  
Jaebum placed them in the hand Mark stretched out, followed by a glass of water.  
“Are you okay other than the headache?” Jaebum asked, sitting next to Mark on the small bed. Mark shrugged.  
“I don’t feel horrible, but I’ve been better.” Jaebum hummed. That seemed to be the end of their conversation, then, and Mark was glad. He was hoping he could ignore the awkwardness of reliving last night, maybe rely on the alcohol as an excuse to say he didn’t remember, if it was brought up.  
He didn’t want this to affect their growing friendship, especially since it was so early on. He didn’t want this to affect how Jaebum thought of him, either, because some of the things he’d said last night were a bit exaggerated, even for him. Bits and pieces of their conversation between the dance and car filtered back to him as he pondered.  
_What if I want you to take advantage of me?_  
Mark mentally smacked himself.  
Jaebum shifted slightly, catching his attention again. He stood quietly.  
“Feel free to nap, you know, sleep it off, okay? I’ll be in the living room. If you get hungry, I’ll show you where the snacks and stuff are, but you’re not eating a ton of shitty food on a hangover.” Mark wheezed out a laugh, agreeing.  
“Thank you, for letting me sleep in your bed, and stuff,” Mark blurted as Jaebum turned to leave. Jaebum smiled softly over his shoulder, that same unreadable expression back on his face for a moment.  
“Of course.”

 

Mark woke up a few hours later, feeling significantly better. His headache was reduced to a dull throb, and he no longer felt like his throat was made of sandpaper. His lower half was sore, but that was something he’d have to ignore for both their sakes. The dull hum of the TV in the living room filtered through the walls. He stretched, loosening up his shoulders, before fixing his sleep-rumpled shirt and padding out of the bedroom on quiet feet.  
Jaebum was on the couch in the living room, as he said he’d be. He must’ve heard Mark, for he glanced over the back of the couch before smirking and pointing to a door next to the sink. Mark opened it, happy to see a pantry full of food. There was an assortment, from apples to cheez-its, and he grabbed the latter, as well as a bottle of water from the pack on the floor. Jaebum patted the couch next to him as Mark walked in.  
“What’re we watching?” Mark asked quietly.  
Jaebum smiled.  
“Pawn Stars.”  
Mark groaned, flopping down next to him. “Really? Isn’t that show for, like, bored dads?” he asked. Jaebum scoffed, mouth falling slightly open.  
“No,” he hissed. “It’s an interesting show! You’ll see.” With that he settled back onto the couch, arms folded. Mark decided not to tell him that his own father watched it.


	2. 2.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> buckle up y'all cause this is an angsty mess

Mark went home feeling significantly better, despite the soreness in his lower half. He greeted his mother as he walked in, wearing one of Jaebum’s tee shirts to hide the fact that he was covered in hickeys, since last night’s clothes were definitely too telling. His mother was happy to see him, hugging him tightly, and Mark found comfort in the soft, sweet scent of her perfume. 

 

Everything about their night together had him reeling. He’d made a new friend,  _ violated _ that friendship in one of the worst ways possible, and then pretended like it was all a drunken mistake that he didn’t remember, but he remembered _ every _ detail. The slick of sweat under his palms as he leaned on Jaebum’s chest, the sounds that left his bitten lips, the press of his fingers into Mark’s hips. It was all vivid, unaltered by the alcohol, and painfully  _ real. _

 

His mind whirled. Jaebum had acted like nothing had happened, which was what Mark  _ wanted, _ right? The assumption that Jaebum had probably made, that Mark was too intoxicated to remember, weighed heavy on his shoulders.He and Jaebum were new friends, despite the familiar feeling their friendship inspired. They met a few weeks ago, and last night was a mistake, and Mark felt guilty for enjoying the thrill that remembering it caused him, felt guilty for the pride that flared up every time he moved a certain way and felt the soreness throb again. 

 

He felt guilty about a lot of it, he mused. The guilt was different than regret, and sat easily in the pit of his stomach, lighter than regret would’ve been. 

 

But it would have honestly been easier to regret it. They could have labelled it a drunken one-night stand, cut ties, gone back to the respectful, clipped tones in class, the odd glance in the hallways. Instead, he was stuck here, still trying to decipher the softness and unreadable look in Jaebum’s eyes, and pretending that the scent of Jaebum clinging to the tee shirt didn’t soothe his senses. He mindlessly checked his phone, continuously, waiting for a message from Jaebum, but it never came. 

 

He briefly considered texting him first, but after what he’d initiated last night, he decided that it would probably be a good idea to wait instead, so he didn’t seem clingy or desperate or anything. His fingers played with the hem of his shirt,  _ Jaebum’s shirt, _ as he put his phone down and staring blankly at the plastic stars on the ceiling, mocking him with their timeless innocence. 

 

The rest of his day was spent sprawled on his bed with his phone on his tummy, waiting for it to buzz. Sooner or later, he fell asleep with the fading scent of Jaebum obscuring his senses. 

  
  
  
  


The entire weekend passed without word from Jaebum, and Mark was starting to feel as if he’d taken the guilt and Jaebum had taken the regret. He didn’t like the sinking feeling in his gut whenever the other boy’s face brushed his thoughts. He didn’t like how upset he felt over it all. 

 

He looked in the mirror and he was an absolute mess. Even a shower did nothing to brighten up his pallid skin, and his hair flopped damply onto his forehead. 

 

“Are you okay?” His mother asked softly, knocking lightly on his bedroom door as she nudged it open with her foot. 

 

Mark shrugged, contemplating telling her everything.  _ I’m gay and last night I hooked up with my new friend and neighbor, smoked three blunts, got drunk, and woke up hungover in his bed and it’s emotionally tearing me up because I might like him more than I’m ready to. _

 

It just wasn’t worth getting into right now, and so he didn’t. He let her wrap him up in a hug, 

 

His mother simply brushed his hair off his forehead with gentle hands and told him to feel better, letting him stay home the following Monday. Mark was glad for the lack of interrogation, because at this point, he didn’t know what he felt, or why, or how to explain it to someone who didn’t even know that he was smoking weed and getting drunk and being fucked in the car of the guy who lives down the street. The whole situation was confusing and as the hours of Monday ticked by, Mark began to lose hope. 

  
  
  
  


Mark returned to school midday on Tuesday, much to Jackson’s delight. The boy squealed when he saw Mark put his tray on the table, jumping from Jinyoung’s side and enveloping him in a tight hug, small white sparks ricocheting between them as he pulled away, smiling widely. Light elementals were easily excitable, and Jackson was probably the  _ epitome _ of a light elemental.

 

“Where were you??” he asked. 

 

Mark allowed himself a weak smile. 

 

“I was at home, Jacks. I didn’t feel too good yesterday.” Jackson made a face of disgust. 

 

“Eww, and you let me hug you? Are you sick? Is it contagious???” Mark shrugged and grinned at him. Jackson whined and sat next to Jinyoung again, and the latter patted him on the back consolingly. 

 

“I’m gonna get sick,” Mark heard him whine, probably pouting at Jinyoung. Disgustingly cute, those two. 

 

Mark began to pick at his food, not hungry enough to really eat. Youngjae sat down on his right and hugged him without a word, tucking his chin up onto Mark’s shoulder. Mark let their heads rest together, pulling Youngjae close. His precious Youngjae, probably his best friend at this point. He was thankful that his younger friend didn’t question him. Don’t get him wrong, he loved Jackson, he was a great friend and he knew how to make Mark smile but-- his need to know often overpowered his common sense and he ended up bombarding him with questions that, frankly, sometimes shouldn’t be discussed in front of other people, but that never deterred him.

 

“You don’t feel happy today,” Youngjae mused quietly, wrapping his small, cool hands around Mark’s own hand. Mark shrugged, mindful of the boy’s head. 

 

“Is it the something?” 

 

“Huh?” 

 

Youngjae smiled and lifted his head. “The  _ something _ that you wouldn’t talk about.” 

 

Oh. Jaebum was the something. 

 

Mark shrugged again, not letting Youngjae know exactly how close he was to the truth, but the boy probably already knew anyway. Youngjae tangled their fingers together and with his other hand, Mark patted his head affectionately. 

 

He felt a heavy gaze on him, and looked up from he and Youngjae’s entwined hands to see Jaebum pinning him with a stare that could have levelled mountains, it was so intense, even from across the cafeteria. The first time Mark had seen him since he’d gone home, and he still looked perfectly cool; he wore a backwards snapback and a red adidas windbreaker, and his eyes were trained on Mark. 

 

Something in the air between them shifted, ever-so-slightly, and Jaebum chose to look at Youngjae, both to Mark’s relief and dismay. The boy was blissfully unaware, leaning on Mark and using his fork to draw a smiley face in Mark’s mashed potatoes (what a cutie pie.) Jaebum looked at Mark once more before standing and leaving, not even bothering to pick up his tray. His backpack was slung low over his shoulder and he all but stormed out, and Mark was more than confused. 

 

His attention snapped back to Youngjae as he released Mark’s hand, mumbling complaints about how warm his skin was all of a sudden. Mark didn’t respond, looking at the face in his potatoes with a heavy feeling in his stomach that was definitely  _ not _ guilt. 

  
  
  
  


Mark’s walk home was cold. At first, he attributed it to the winter air, but as it steadily grew colder, he heard the steps approaching him. He was flipped around and pressed into the nearest building, Jaebum’s arms on either side of his head. His eyebrows were pulled down into a glare, eyes dark and dangerous, the air flowing off of him colder and more volatile than Mark thought was possible. Mark’s backpack slid to the ground.

 

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” he growled. 

 

Mark’s mouth fell open. “ _ What?” _

 

Jaebum’s lip lifted in a sneer and the cold around him seemed to vibrate as it intensified.

 

“You don’t even think it’s wrong, asshole? You don’t think it’s fucked up to toy with him, to cheat on him and act like you didn’t? To pretend like our night together wasn’t real?” 

 

Mark’s confusion grew.

 

“What? Cheat on who?” 

 

Jaebum looked at him angrily, and the grass at his feet began to splinter over with ice crystals.

 

“Your  _ boyfriend, _ dumbass, the world’s sweetest earth elemental, the one you’re with  _ literally every day.” _ As his breath puffed in front of him and the grass froze solid, Mark took a moment to process the words. 

 

Earth elemental?

 

_ Youngjae. _

 

Mark burst out laughing, ignoring the fact that he was so close to Jaebum, who looked so dangerous, and ignoring that this was the first time they’d talked in  _ days _ . Jaebum frowned deeply and narrowed his eyes. 

 

“What’s so funny?” 

 

“He’s not- Youngjae’s not-” Mark wheezed, feeling his eyes scrunch up from laughing. 

 

“Not what?”

 

“We’re not dating,” Mark finally gasped. “Youngjae is just my friend.” 

 

Jaebum grew stone still, his arms still braced around Mark. 

 

“What?” 

 

“We’re not dating,” Mark repeated. Jaebum let out a small breath, frowning off to the side, looking terrified for a small moment, but it was probably just Mark’s imagination.

 

He reclined into the brick a little, studying Jaebum’s face as a question floated to the surface of his mind amidst the amused laughter. 

 

“If you thought we were dating, why did you.. You know?” he asked quietly. 

 

Jaebum looked so pained, choosing to look at the ground as he responded rather than Mark. 

 

“Because I’m selfish. You’re so… you’re so  _ unreal _ , you’re supportive and cute and you have the best laugh in the world and I thought-- I just wanted you to myself. But I started to feel guilty, and seeing how close you two were at lunch, I panicked.” 

 

Mark’s cheeks burned in a heated blush as Jaebum looked up, into his eyes, the unreadable expression back and stronger than ever. 

 

He continued. “I was angry, at myself and you, and how close you were sitting, and I felt jealous and hated it.” His eyes searched Mark’s, the cold from his skin pulsing with worry. Mark tuned out his explanation in favor of drinking in his appearance. He never was good at apologies, giving or receiving. 

 

Jaebum’s hat hadn’t shifted, but his jacket had. It was zipped up, but a bit rumpled where the straps of his backpack pulled at it. Mark wondered if his hickeys were still under there. With timid hands, he reached up, aware of Jaebum’s curious gaze, and unzipped the part over his neck. Sure enough, his skin was still peppered with purpled marks, though they were more faded at this point. A few were almost gone completely. He let his thumb trace over one, and looked up to see Jaebum’s eyes closed, face still looking slightly pained. 

 

“Mark,” he rasped. Mark’s heart leapt. 

 

“What are we?” 

 

His eyes fluttered open, dark and questioning.

 

Mark swallowed heavily, unsure of how to answer.  _ What do you want to be? _

 

“I… I don’t know,” he murmured. “My parents, they… they really only want me to be with similar elementals, but… I like you.” Hope sparkled in Jaebum’s eyes. 

 

“What’ll happen? If we… if  _ you _ decide, one day, if this is what you want?” 

 

Mark couldn’t meet his eyes. 

 

“It’s not up to me to decide.” 

 

“What? Of course it is! It’s  _ your _ life.” 

 

“No, Jae, it’s not that I can’t decide.”  _ I already have. _ “My parents would throw me out. They won’t have an unsure future, not after only producing fire elementals for this long, and especially not.. Not me with… with a boy…  It’s… selective.” His voice narrowed to an unsure quiver on the last word. 

 

Jaebum grimaced, grabbing Mark’s hand softly.

 

“I’m sorry.” 

 

Those two words carried more worth than anything else Jaebum could have said, and they conveyed such clear pain that Mark was struck down to the soul. He’d never heard such a heartfelt apology, nor one so pained. 

 

Mark squeezed Jaebum’s hand in response, leaning forward and resting his head on Jaebum’s shoulder softly. 

 

“I really do like you, though,” he croaked, throat tightening. Tears pricked at his eyes. 

 

Jaebum’s arms wrapped around him, pulling him closer and feeling so comforting that Mark’s eyes closed automatically. Jaebum rubbed soothing circles into his back. 

 

“It hurts,” Mark whispered. “This hurts.” He pushed his face against the skin of Jaebum’s neck, wrapping his own arms tightly around his lithe torso, snaking under his backpack. He sniffled into the fabric of his jacket and Jaebum stroked his back soothingly. 

 

“I know,” he murmured. 

 

Mark nuzzled into him, breathing deeply. He smelled the same, clean and crisp and so uniquely Jaebum, and Mark thought he smelled like home. 

 

Jaebum exhaled heavily into Mark’s hair, and Mark could feel the tension in the way he was standing. He wished desperately that he could do something about it. After a long moment spent cozy in his embrace, Jaebum pulled away, and Mark was actually able to feel the comfort he felt in his embrace pull away as well. He shuffled his feet as Jaebum scooped his backpack off the ground, slinging it around his own shoulder rather than back onto Mark’s. 

 

“Let’s go home,” Jaebum murmured, one hand coming to rest lightly,  _ possessively,  _ against the small of Mark’s back as they walked. (Dazedly, Mark thought to himself,  _ I am home when I’m with you. _ ) The winter air was biting, and even though Jaebum’s own hands weren’t much different, they felt warmer somehow. Mark let this realization sink in, along with the fact that they’d completely bypassed his house and were headed to Jaebum’s. Mark texted his mother and then put his phone on silent. 

  
  
  
  


Jaebum unlocked the door and the same cat was there when he opened it, and Mark stooped to pet her. She purred and arched her back, nuzzling into his hand without hesitation, her sleepy blue eyes drifting shut. She was almost as cute as Jaebum.(and that’s, like, a very reluctant  _ almost.  _ Not that he’d admit to it.) 

 

Her owner was setting their backpacks on the table in the kitchen, moving towards the fridge and pulling it open. Mark stood from his crouch and walked over, hesitantly standing behind him. His arms slid around his waist and he rested his head on his back softly, pushing down the butterflies in his stomach, because after the talk they’d just had, this was  _ not okay, _ but he couldn’t bring himself to care much as Jaebum let out a shaky breath and relaxed against him. 

 

“We shouldn’t..” Jaebum rasped. His voice was strained. 

 

“Not even just… like this? Alone?” Mark’s voice was soft and carried more hope than he cared to admit. 

 

Jaebum was so, so scared, and Mark could practically feel it. Scratch that, he  _ could _ . He was scared too. 

 

“Maybe… maybe we can.” 

 

Mark loved his answer but hated the hesitance in his voice as he said it. He nuzzled closer against Jaebum’s back, heart racing. It felt dangerous, even if they were home alone, but oh, so right. Jaebum’s yet-to-be-seen parents could potentially come home at any second and see them.

 

Jaebum turned in his arms, tipping his chin up and capturing his lips in a hungry kiss. Jaebum was worth the risk, Mark decided, as they tumbled towards his room. 

  
  
  


Mark opened his eyes to the familiar scene of Jaebum’s wall, but unlike last time, he was wrapped up tightly in Jaebum’s arms, with his back pressed to the younger boy’s chest. He was positive his hair was a mess, post-coital and rumpled from sleep, and his lower half had a newly familiar soreness again; his skin was littered with little reddish purple marks, and so was Jaebum’s chest, and his entire body ached, honestly, but he was, for the first time in a long time, truly  _ happy. _

 

Jaebum was sleeping, and the cat, Nora, was curled against Mark’s tummy, sleeping as well. Mark let his fingers drift across her back, and she yawned sleepily, stretching out towards him and bumping her nose against his fingertips. 

 

It was dark outside the window, and the room was drowning in sleepy, warm shadows. It felt incredibly domestic. He smiled sleepily and tried to covertly slip out of Jaebum’s arms without notice, but a sleepy groan rumbled against his back and Jaebum’s arms tightened. 

 

“Dun’ leave,” he mumbled. 

 

Mark glanced at the alarm clock on the night stand. 

 

“It’s almost nine.” 

 

Jaebum’s eyes shot open, and he borderline threw Mark away from his body. 

 

“Get dressed.  _ Now. _ ” 

 

Mark frowned in confusion, hastily sliding back into his clothes without a word as Jaebum rushed to straighten up the mess they’d made. The memory of being pressed against the wall, into those sheets, drifted into his mind, and Mark shuddered with pleasure. 

 

The memory slipped as soon as the sound of the front door unlocking broke the tense silence, and Jaebum froze. 

 

“Shit,” he breathed, hurriedly putting his own clothes back on. “Fuck. Shit, um, get in the closet.” 

 

“ _ What?”  _ Mark’s tone was incredulous now. Jaebum grabbed his shoulder roughly, turning him towards the closet. 

 

“In. Be as quiet as you can. Please,” his voice cracked on the last word. Mark’s nerves picked up and he stepped gingerly into the space, letting Jaebum close the door after he was inside. An acoustic guitar bumped against his calf, and he winced, relaxing as it didn’t shift. 

 

A booming voice echoed down the hallway, accompanied by unsteady footsteps. “ _ Jaebum!”  _ Mark’s knees wobbled unsteadily as the door to Jaebum’s room was slammed open, the stink of cheap alcohol reaching his nose even through the closet doors. 

 

“What th’ fuck do you think you’re doin’, you lazy,” a belch, “piece of trash?” Mark’s heart stuttered in his chest. He couldn’t see anything from behind the door, but in the space underneath, he noticed the flicker of a shadow as Jaebum shifted uncomfortably. 

 

“I-I’m cleaning,” Jaebum mumbled. 

 

“Cleaning, yeah, right. I know you, you little  _ fuck _ , you little...” a hiccup this time, “...little  _ gay prick _ . You some sort o’ limp wrist or somethin’?” A long moment of silence followed, with Mark breathing unsteadily, desperately hoping to be quiet. 

 

“Well? You gonna say somethin’ or just stand there?” Another brief silence. 

 

“Worthless little prick.” The dull  _ thump _ of someone getting hit, followed almost immediately by the sound of knees hitting the floor with force.

 

There was a thick scoff and the heavy footsteps receded, and Mark heard Jaebum take a shaky breath. He peeked through the crack in the door to see him with his back turned to him, standing slowly from where he fell on his knees, gripping tightly onto a pillowcase. Carefully, soundlessly, Mark pushed the door open. 

 

“You should probably just go,” Jaebum said quietly. 

 

Mark swallowed and reached for his hand, hurt when he pulled away. He pushed it down and slid the window open, thankful that they were on the bottom floor.

 

“Jaebum..” Mark whispered.  

 

“I’ll bring your backpack in the morning,” he mumbled, dismissing him, not even turning to watch Mark go. Mark’s chest felt heavy as he slipped out, sparing Jaebum one last glance over his shoulder before stepping into the brisk night air and jogging lightly through the grass to his house, not even caring that he didn’t have shoes on. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> first of all, I'm *obviously* markbum trash but y'all don't understand how invested I am in every fic i write, this is just the fuckin tip of the iceberg  
> thank you for reading!! comments are welcome and appreciated, and the next chapter'll be up soon


	3. 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for the huge delay!!  
> i have a lot in mind for this story but idk how to put it into action, I'm gonna try to update more though!

Mark avoided his mother’s questions when he got home, immediately going to his room and locking himself in. He was thankful for the ensuite bathroom, and as he tried fervently to wash the memories of Jaebum’s kisses off of his skin, his stomach dropped as he remembered the angry yelling of Jaebum’s house. 

Why did he listen to Jaebum when he told him to leave? The cold water of the shower did nothing to soothe the angry burning of his skin, the water droplets actually hissing as they made contact with the heated skin. 

Why didn’t he do anything? His fingers angrily rubbed shampoo into his platinum hair, and his eyebrows pulled down heavily. He was angry at himself, he was angry at Jaebum for not telling him, but mostly he was angry at that piece of shit that Jaebum called a  _ father, _ angry at how easily he commanded Jaebum’s obedience. It was completely dumbfounding to him. Not only was Jaebum one of the most unworthy people of that sort of treatment, but he seemed to be  _ used to it. _

Mark rinsed himself off and grabbed his towel, skin warming it dangerously. He wrapped it around himself and stepped into his room, getting dressed quickly. He rummaged through his pockets for his phone, which was still on silent. He had several missed texts from Jaebum, all taking place during his long shower. 

_ From: Jaebummie, 9:06 PM _

_ I’m so sorry  _

 

_ From: Jaebummie, 9:17 PM _

_ Please don’t ignore me, please _

 

_ From: Jaebummie, 9:21 PM  _

_ This is all my fault Mark I’m so sorry _

 

_ From: Jaebummie, 9:34 PM _

_ I never meant for you to fibd out, not like htis _

 

_ From: Jaebummie, 9:42 PM _

_ Mark I cabt do thsi im’ so sotry _

 

_ From: Jaebummie, 9:43 PM _

_ Plesae dobt leavr me _

 

_ From: Jaebummie, 9:43 PM _

_ Yor e alk i havf lefrt _

 

_ From: Jaebummie, 9:43 PM  _

_ Ibmis syou  _

 

Mark swallowed heavily, noting the gradually decreasing quality of the texts as Jaebum probably cried whilst waiting for Mark’s reply. He was still able to decipher them. 

 

_ To: Jaebummie, 9:45 PM _

_ u know which house is mine right?  _

 

_ From: Jaebummie, 9:45 PM  _

_ Yesd _

 

_ To: Jaebummie, 9:45 PM _

_ my room is on the second floor, the one with the tree right outside.  _

 

_ From: Jaebummie, 9:46 PM _

_ I’ll bringn your backbpack _

 

Mark opened his window despite the winter chill, sitting back on his bed apprehensively. A few minutes later there was a rustling in the tree, and Jaebum’s hands gripped onto the edge of the windowsill, pulling himself up. He slid over the sill and looked at Mark from under his bangs for a second, before directing his gaze to the floor. Slung over one shoulder was Mark’s backpack, which he placed on the floor gently. 

Mark stood and wordlessly pulled Jaebum into his arms, rubbing his back softly. Jaebum’s strong arms wrapped around his waist and pulled him close, and he sighed shakily into Mark’s neck. After a moment he felt the icy slide of a tear against his skin, and Mark tightened his arms around Jaebum’s neck, burying his nose in the younger boy’s hair. 

“I’m sorry,” Jaebum rasped. 

Mark sighed, littering Jaebum’s icy neck with comforting kisses. 

“Don’t be.” 

Jaebum shook in his arms and Mark was in awe. This boy, this tough and hard-imaged boy, trusted him enough to show his true emotions, to cry and hold him and apologize for things he shouldn’t apologize for. 

“C’mere,” Mark murmured against him, pulling them back towards the bed. 

“Mark-” Jaebum protested. 

Mark pulled them down onto the duvet, pulling Jaebum closer to himself and tangling their legs together. 

“Shh,” Mark said. He wasn’t good at comforting. “Let’s go to sleep, okay Jae? Everything else isn’t important right now. Just relax and sleep.” 

Jaebum sniffled and nodded, burying his face in Mark’s chest and wrapping his arms even tighter around his waist. Mark traced lightly up and down his back with his fingertips, pressing a kiss into the crown of his head. 

After not too long, Jaebum’s shoulders lost their tension, and his breathing evened out, becoming deep and drawn out. Mark pulled the blankets up over them and let himself drift into sleep as well. 

  
  


As a complete reversal of their usual naps, Mark woke up with Jaebum in his arms, curled into him from the previous night. The sun was shining blindingly through his window, where an icy breeze slid inside and swirled lazily about the room. Against him, Jaebum’s skin was cool as ever, warmed where it touched Mark’s, smooth and lighting up like golden honey in the sunlight. 

Mark let his fingers drift reverently over all that he could see. His skin was soft and unblemished, save for the marks from their night together and the subtle bruising on his right cheekbone from his piece of shit father. Mark’s heart twisted as his fingers circled it slowly, Jaebum’s eyes fluttering in his sleep. 

Though Jaebum was obviously the dominant one in whatever messed up kind of relationship they had (or didn’t have?) Mark greatly enjoyed comforting him. He felt important with someone in his arms, felt like he was doing something good. 

Jaebum snuffled closer to him, his arms tightening around Mark’s waist. He blinked groggily at Mark and grunted softly, hiding his face against the older’s chest. 

Mark let his fingers card through his hair soothingly, chest sinking as he realized they would have to talk about what happened. He tugged Jaebum closer, holding him as tightly as he’d wanted to when it happened, burying his face in his hair and breathing out slowly. 

If he wasn’t careful, considering the events of the night, he’d get angry, and the last time he’d been legitimately upset at something, his blood had burned like lava and melted the glass in his hand, and he did  _ not _ want to see what that kind of heat would do to an ice elemental. 

“Jae,” he whispered. A muffled whine sounded out in reply. 

“Jaebum-ah,” 

“Mnn.” 

“We have to talk about last night.” 

“Don’ wanna.” 

_ “Jae,” _

Jaebum grumbled and shifted slightly, resting his head more on Mark’s bicep than chest so he could speak. 

He paused, letting the silence stretch on uncomfortably, and Mark waited. He was used to silence. 

“My dad,” Jaebum began. It sounded like he was getting ready to unleash a maelstrom of awful memories and childhood stories. 

“He was drunk.” 

“I know.” 

“He’s always drunk. Ever since I was a kid he’s been drunk, but not abusive. My mom, she left us,” his hand found Mark’s to ground himself, the contrast between their skin soothing. He traced lines across his palm and fingers as he spoke. 

“She said it wasn’t the same, and that she needed to ‘find herself.’” Jaebum scoffed. “For a while after that, we were okay, y’know? My dad worked his ass off to compensate for the lost income, and for about four years it was okay, his drinking was under control. But then we got this letter in the mail, these papers-- they were divorce papers.” 

Mark’s stomach dropped. 

“There was a letter along with them, saying that she’d used his drunkenness to finalize the papers without any input from him. Since I was fourteen, I was old enough to be left at home alone, which I was when he went to work, so they considered me responsible enough to handle myself.”

“His temper just got worse, though. His drinking got worse and he started abusing me, hitting me and calling me things, using me to vent his anger. I,” he sniffled, “I look too much like my mom, he-he’d think I was her, sometimes, and get even angrier and-and--” 

Mark rubbed his back soothingly, enveloping one of his hands in his own. 

“I’m so sorry, Jae.” 

Jaebum let out a broken sob and once again, Mark’s perception of him shifted. He was no longer big and bad and unapproachably gorgeous. He was real, he was human, he was vulnerable and he was soft, precious in a way that even Youngjae wasn’t. 

Perhaps it was the tough guy persona he projected that made it so profound, or perhaps it was Mark’s constantly growing feelings toward the boy, but Mark was only sure that he wanted to protect him and give him the love he deserved. 

He cradled Jaebum softly, holding back his own tears as the boy shook in his arms. 

Though it was Wednesday, Mark decided that they’d be here for the day. Skipping one day wouldn’t affect much. 

  
  


With his mother at work, Mark and Jaebum were safe to be around the house. Jaebum explored his way to Mark’s living room, curling on the sofa in a large woolen blanket. 

Meanwhile, Mark left for the kitchen and considered the pantry of ingredients. He wanted to make them some food, but not only could he not cook, but he had no recipes on hand. Canned soup it was. 

He heated up two bowls and took them to the living room, setting them on the table and flipping the TV to a channel showing Pawn Stars. 

Jaebum looked at him like he single-handedly put the stars in the sky. 

“You remembered?” He asked in a hushed voice. 

“Of course.” 

Jaebum smiled weakly, shifting to sit next to Mark on the floor, still wrapped in the large blanket. Mark put one arm around his broad shoulders, using the other to lift the spoon to Jaebum’s mouth. 

“You seriously aren’t feeding me,” he grumbled. 

“I am. Open up.” 

Jaebum smiled again and complied, looking like he enjoyed being taken care of more than he let on. Mark continued to feed him the soup until it was gone and his own was cold before even considering eating. He kissed Jaebum on the lips gently, tasting the soup broth and tears, but mostly tasting  _ Jaebum _ and deciding that he rather liked feeding him. Liked protecting him.

Jaebum cuddled into Mark’s side as he ate, not minding the cold soup because of the arms around his waist. They both watched the show with interest, Jaebum more-so than Mark. He was too focused on running his thumb over Jaebum’s knuckles to watch with his full interest, but it wasn’t bad. They spent the day like that, cuddling sleepily and watching the marathon on TV. 

“Is it supposed to have gossip?” Mark whispered. 

Jaebum shrugged, bumping against Mark. “I dunno, but they always act like they hate each other to add drama.” 

“Why do they want drama?” 

Jaebum shrugged again. 

Mark continued tracing his thumb across the boy’s hand, letting his thoughts wander to the feelings he had for him. 

He wanted to protect him, but he also wanted him to protect him. He wanted to wake up with him every morning and kiss him every free second. He wanted to laugh with him and he wanted to hold his hand to show everybody that they were together, even if their exact relationship was questionable. Was it fondness or something more? It was definitely something more, if Mark was honest with himself, but he rarely was. 

He ignored the butterflies in his stomach and pressed a kiss to the crown of Jaebum’s head, letting himself get lost in the feeling of his hand in his, warm against cool, and Jaebum wrapped around him. It was heavenly. 

  
  
  


They decided, eventually, to sneak on campus for lunch and visit Mark’s friends. This was easier said than done, and took a good thirty minutes and a hushed bribe with a teacher who happened to favor Mark, but once they were there the bell rang and students began their trek to the cafeteria, where they decided to wait. Jaebum sat uncertainly next to Mark, fidgeting. 

Jackson’s squeal could be heard across the cafeteria. He was suddenly rushing towards Mark and he hardly had a second to gasp in a breath before it was being harshly hugged out of him and he was being shaken from side to side excitedly. 

“Where were you? Don’t tell me you’re sick again, you better not be, and- who’s this?” 

Jaebum gave a forced smile. “Jaebum.” 

Jackson leaned down to Mark’s ear to whisper conspiratorially. (read: quietly yell.) 

“ _ Mark, _ you dog, you didn’t tell me you had a  _ boyfriend! _ ” Mark felt his face heat up and saw Jaebum’s cheeks flush as well, but neither of them denied it. Progress, right? 

Jinyoung, Yugyeom and Bambam walked up at a normal pace, catching up to Jackson and smiling at the three of them. Bambam and Yugyeom, of course, sat across from them, immediately gossiping with Jackson, who sat next to Jinyoung, just to Jaebum’s left. The only one missing was Youngjae (who was busy getting lunch in the line; a salad, per usual.)

Everyone was pretty disappointed to learn that Jaebum was barely younger than Mark, everyone obligingly calling him  _ hyung _ except Youngjae, who already knew and was comfortable with Jaebum. (much to Jaebum’s protest.)

Their chat was small and for the most part, Jaebum seemed to fit in with their little group, although he talked quietly and rarely. It matched well with Mark’s quiet temperament, and although they were involved enough in the conversations going on around them, they also seemed to be in their own little bubble. It was nice, Mark thought, having all his friends together in one place, talking and laughing. 

“Hey man, what’s your phone number?” Jackson asked, sliding a napkin and pen down the table to Jaebum. He scribbled it down uncertainly, smiling when Jackson whooped and snatched both items back up. 

“Careful, Jinyoung, you might have some competition.” Yugyeom said, sounding teasing yet ominously serious at the same time. (How he managed such a thing was beyond Mark.)  Jinyoung’s ears turned red and he gaped, mouth hanging open and closing uselessly. 

“I-I- What is that supposed to mean?? Ya, you didn’t even call me  _ hyung, _ you punk!” Bambam laughed loudly, and Jackson was frozen with his face in his hands, making him look like a child despite his massive biceps. Mark noticed Jinyoung’s hand slip complacently around his waist. At this, the entire table erupted into laughter, and Jinyoung simply stuck his tongue out and rubbed Jackson’s back to take the embarrassment away.

Not long after, Jaebum’s hand reached for his under the table, only finding it due to the difference in temperatures. Mark’s heart leapt and, beside him, Youngjae smiled, a warm, secret-holding smile. 

“He’s the  _ something _ , isn’t he, hyung?” he asked quietly. Damn earth elementals and their attuned sense to emotion.

Mark only smiled and squeezed Jaebum’s hand under the table. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is considerably shorter than the others, i'm sorry ;n;


	4. 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is very very very short and i apologize for that!! im working on full fics so right now chaptered fics are kind of a side project. enjoy!!

 

Once they were back at Mark’s house, a somewhat heavy tension settled between them. The break from reality had been nice, yes, but nothing is always  _ nice, _ and the time had come for a serious discussion; that much, they could both feel. 

Mark’s head swam as he tried to formulate a plan, his fingers laced with Jaebum’s on the couch, watching (you guessed it) Pawn Stars. Jaebum looked to be almost asleep, his eyes closed to narrow slits, but they tracked the screen aptly. Mark swallowed. 

“Jaebum,” he said quietly. He looked up at him, his eyes returning to normal. “I have to talk to you.” 

“I know,” Jaebum said. Mark frowned. 

“How?” 

“Your hands tighten when you think about bad things,” he murmured, brushing his thumb over Mark’s knuckles and making him flush at the gesture. “What’s up?” 

Mark noted that despite his calm air, the slump of his shoulders and his hand constant in his own, his temperature dropped, the chill sinking deep into Mark’s bones. He was scared. 

“I.. You know that, if things ever get too bad, you can come here, right?” 

There was a long pause, and Mark thought at first that he’d overstepped some unspoken boundary, ventured too far into territory he wasn’t supposed to, and his anxieties tripled with each millisecond that passed. Jaebum took a shaky breath.

“I do.” 

“I mean it, Jae. I want you to be safe.” 

“I… thank you.” 

“Of course.”  _ I love you. _

The words were left unspoken, but they both felt as if they’d been uttered directly to their hearts. 

  
  


Mark did his best to explain the situation to his mother without including anything about weed, dance clubs, alcohol, sex, or being boyfriends (which was a question in itself,) and thankfully she mostly understood. She offered Jaebum the guest bedroom of the house without hesitation.

At dinner that night, which his mom insisted upon, they discussed. 

“So Jaebum,” she said. He looked up sharply from his noodles. 

“I understand that there’s some… trouble, at home. Am I correct in assuming that staying here would be safer for you?” 

He slowly chewed on his noodles, taking his time before answering. Winter pulsated off of him in steady beats, chilled against Mark’s skin. 

“Yes, ma’am,” he murmured. “But please don’t feel obligated-” 

“Hey,” she cut him off. “You need somewhere to stay and we have a spare bedroom. My only obligation is being hospitable to my guest.” She made a point of taking the burden of staying off his shoulders..

Jaebum flushed, glancing down at his food before his eyes flickered up to her. 

_ Thank you, _ his eyes said. 

She smiled.  _ Of course. _

Mark watched all this quietly, as he did. He sat and observed and processed everything that was happening, trying not to feel like the ground was moving out from under his feet and he was tripping over himself to try to keep up with it.

She accepted Jaebum. She accepted that he was Mark’s (best) friend, and she willingly offered to house him here to save him from potential danger. 

Jaebum was safe. He was  _ here. _ He was sitting to Mark’s left, eating dinner with them and talking to his mom, calm and less worried than Mark had seen him in a few days.

The lingering possibility of his mom accepting that he was probably (totally) in love with his best friend, his  _ ice elemental _ best friend, weighed heavily on his mind, setting into his bones, making itself at home amidst the embers. 

She liked Jaebum enough, right? They were getting along, eating and chatting, and his mom accepted him no matter what, right? She was his  _ mom. _

He hadn’t even come out, yet. He’d just sort of let them assume that he was single because none of the girls knew him as more than the quiet kid. But the knowledge that if he did, he might not be accepted by his parents, well. It hurt. It sat in his stomach like a rock, cold and heavy. He shuddered. 

To his right, Jaebum shot him an apologetic smile, thinking that he was the cause of Mark’s shiver. Mark managed a tight smile back. 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> an update is an update, i suppose
> 
> questions/comments are always appreciated <3

**Author's Note:**

> next chapter coming soon!! it's my first time doing a chaptered fic so I hope you enjoy!
> 
> comments/requests are welcome and appreciated~


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